Hello 2020! And good riddance to 2019! I say that with a grain of salt, as last year was certainly one of the most difficult years that I ever had to deal with. Throughout it I was challenged in ways that I never thought possible. There were several difficult conversations I had to have, even with myself. I learned more about myself and what I want in life than I initially expected. During these lessons learned, I also discovered the things that I do NOT want in my life. So, with that being said I present you with the top 5 things I am leaving behind in 2019! Hopefully, you will leave them behind too!
Okay, so this won’t be an instant thing obviously. More so, I am going to leave behind the habits that put us in debt. We have our game plan to tackle our mound of debt and one of my goals for 2020 is to pay it off. I am going to be more mindful of my spending, waste less by using more of the things I already have at home or find new ways to utilize things. I am going to purge things that no longer benefit us, and hopefully earn us some extra cash in the process. We have a savings account set up and this year, we will be paying ourselves with every pay check as if it’s a bill. I will not put myself further into debt to show people that I love them (a.k.a. Going overboard on birthdays and holidays!)
So, many people don’t realize but I left a toxic work environment last year. The position had become so stressful and micromanaged that I dreaded coming into work everyday. Coworkers that made the job lovable were reading the writing on the wall and jumping ship. I finally followed the pattern after my pay was drastically changed, I haven’t looked back since! I’ve started working in a new career that is closer to my degree. My stress level has dropped to near nothing! I love my coworkers, and I still keep in touch with the friends I made at my former job. Weekends actually exist now that I am no longer on call 24/7. Once I clock out, my time is just that. MY time. I will share more about this decision in another post coming soon!
Get out of here with that negativity! Come in with all the positivity! One of my problems of the past year was focusing too much on the negative to a point where it became difficult to appreciate the good things that were still around me. I tried to control everything just to try and deal with the stress of everything. To be honest, I wasn’t my best self. There was a time that I wasn’t the best wife, I wasn’t the best mom, I wasn’t the best friend. To my family and friends, I’m sorry. I’ve learned enough to admit that there were plenty of mistakes that I’ve made and poor attitude or decisions. But it’s not too late to change that. Those emotions and reactions do nothing to benefit me, they do not serve me any longer. They never did. Misdirecting my frustrations is wrong for everybody. So, I leave them behind!
WORRYING ABOUT MY APPEARANCE
Throughout 2019, I stress ate. A Lot. I drank more alcohol than I ever had before. There was very little form of exercise going on. Naturally, I put on some pounds which bothered me even more. It didn’t matter to me that everyone else said I looked fine or that they couldn’t tell. I could tell, I could see it in the mirror every day until I avoided looking in the mirror completely. This year, I’m leaving that behind. I am not going to focus on the numbers on a scale, rather I am going to focus on changing my habits for healthier ones. I am going to eat when I’m hungry, not when I’m stressed. My favorite soda and alcohol drinks are going to be cut back and replaced with water. I’ve slowly adapting to these changes for the last week and already I am started to feel so much better. By taking better care of myself, I can take better care of my family. And as an added bonus, by body is thanking me and my body image is improving.
Alright, if my husband is reading this – stop laughing already! I realize that this is going to be difficult to achieve, and there is no way I am going to completely eliminate this from my nature. However, there is the chance that I can cut back on my procrastination. Instead of constantly putting off the laundry, or the dishes, or even my blog posts – Just go ahead and get it done. So far, I’ve been able to stay on top of little things rather than letting them pile up and just make a bigger problem for me further down the line. Retrospectively, this was probably a red flag of my anxiety as well – possibly even depression. So by taking these baby steps, I’m feeling better. Keeping up with a few simpler things while steadily adding more to the list I don’t feel overwhelmed. The urge to do everything ‘right now’ sometimes causes me to feel swamped and eventually leads to me not wanting to do (or see) any of it. So, I’m just doing it. It just happens to be in bite-size chunks that’s making life more manageable for me. On top of this, I’m not beating myself up if I don’t accomplish everything I want to get done. Rather I look at everything I have completed, and try to do a little more tomorrow.
Well, there you have it. Those are my top 5 things that I am leaving behind in 2019. What are YOU leaving behind? Bad habits? Toxic people? Comment and let me know! Stay tuned for my goals for 2020!